The Kindess of Strangers

I can be a social contradiction.

Most of the time, if you make eye contact with me or exchange a passing pleasantry, you will find me to be affable, easy going and open to the encounter. Most people would describe me as extroverted, approachable; curious about and interested in others. Heck, I’m in sales.

There are, however, a few who – upon becoming close acquaintances – revealed their initial impressions of me to be aloof and a bit distant. While this information usually catches me by surprise, I do recognize the solitary part of me that occasionally folds into itself - - the me that isn’t always agreeable to making a connection or chatting with strangers.

Such was the case on a recent early AM flight…

The friendly gentleman seated next to me was just a little too inquisitive for my morning disposition.

“Are you going or leaving home?” he smiled, referring to our North Carolina destination.

“Leaving.” My response was not curt but neither did it invite further conversation.

I deliberately did not offer a reciprocating question.

“Traveling for business or pleasure?” he now inquired. His eyes were blue and crinkled at the corners.

“Business.”

“What do you do?”

“I’m in sales for a healthcare recruitment company.” I delivered this reply while mentally establishing an invisible wall in the vacant seat between us. I kept my focus forward.

The man shifted in his seat, positioning himself with greater interest.

“And has the economic downturn had much of an impact on your industry?”

“A bit,” I nodded, reaching for my bag. I offered a polite smile as I opened my book.

The man, acknowledging my silent request for privacy, gazed out the window and the rest of the nearly hour and a half flight was blissfully quiet.

Occasionally, as I turned the pages of my latest book club selection, I would glance over at the man. He had slightly adjusted the window shade and lowered the seat back tray before him – a worn bible, open at the middle, relaxed on the surface. He bent over the words as if listening to them; his hands folded in his lap as he read.

His silence broke only once as he chuckled heartily to himself. I looked over, instinctively thinking I might also get the joke only to find that he was, in fact, still reading the bible. Apparently, he had found something among its pages to be good humor.

This charmed me.

As we began our descent and readied ourselves for landing, we simultaneously tucked our reading material away.

“I’m connecting to Fort Lauderdale,” he said, offering the answer to a question I had previously opted not to ask, “for my grandmother’s funeral.”

“Oh…I’m sorry for your loss.”

He smiled warmly in a way that said thank you.

“My mother didn’t want to come,” he continued, “but I had to.”

I intuited that there must be a trailing story and, while I had softened toward the man, I was not inclined to draw it out.

After a momentary pause, he asked, “Is there anything going on in your life you would like me to pray about?”

I looked at him.

I am not a religious person but my impression of the moment shifted from feeling guarded by the personal nature of his question to feeling touched by the generous offer from this man – this stranger – willing to acknowledge something important in my life with his good thoughts and intentions.

Several seconds passed with the man patiently waiting my response. His calm, peaceful nature seemed wise about something I had yet to learn and I blushed, weighing my response as if I had been granted a wish.

Ironically, I don’t want to share what I imparted to the man – this stranger en route to mourn his mother’s mother – but he listened intently with care as I laid my biggest burden at his feet.

The silence returned as we touched down in Charlotte. The man looked out the window and I, once again, kept my focus forward, this time aware of the emotion filling my eyes in the same spot where his crinkled.

Unbuckling my belt, I stood and gathered my belongings. We made eye contact one last time.

I smiled…

“Thank you for asking.”

He returned the gesture warmly in a way that said you're welcome.